English is Funny! It Confuses Us More Than Our Maths Teacher!
English is a funny language, especially in India! We mix it with our regional languages, use phrases that make no sense, and sometimes, English itself confuses us. Just like a tricky maths problem, English makes us think twice. Here are some of the funniest and most contradictory English phrases that will leave you scratching your head!
- Why is a Boxing “Ring” Actually a Square?
Have you ever watched a boxing match? The fighters stand inside a boxing ring, right/ But wait… the ring is actually a square! Shouldn’t it be called a boxing square instead? Looks like English forgot its shapes! - If Teachers Taught, Why Didn’t Preachers Praught?
A teacher taught, so shouldn’t a preacher have praught instead of preached? If we follow the same rule, we should also say, “I braught my lunch” instead of “I brought my lunch!” Maybe English just enjoys bending its own rules! - Why is “Pretty Ugly” a Real Thing?
The word pretty means beautiful, right? But when we say something is pretty ugly, it
actually means very ugly! How can something be both pretty and ugly at the same time? Maybe English just enjoys playing opposites! - If a Vegetarian Eats Vegetables, What Does a Humanitarian Eat?
A vegetarian eats vegetables, so logically, a humanitarian should eat humans! But
don’t worry—humanitarians actually help people, not eat them! Maybe English should rethink its naming rules before it gives us a heart attack! - Why Does a House Burn Up and Burn Down at the Same Time?
If a house catches fire, people say it burned up—as if the flames went up. But they also say it burned down—as if the house disappeared! So, which way did it actually burn? Maybe English is as unpredictable as fire itself! - How Can You “Act Naturally”?
If you are acting, you are pretending. If you are natural, you are being yourself. Then how can you act naturally? It’s like pretending to be real! Sounds like something only Bollywood heroes can do! - Why is There No Egg in Eggplant or Ham in a Hamburger?
An eggplant has no egg, and a hamburger has no ham—just beef or veggies! So, why are they named this way? Maybe English likes to keep us guessing, just like our maths teacher with tricky word problems! - What is an “Original Copy”?
A copy means something that is not original. But when people say “original copy,” they
mean the first version. How can something be both original and a copy? Maybe it’s like a Bollywood remake—different, but still the same story! - What Does “Same Difference” Even Mean?
If two things are the same, there is no difference, right? But when someone says “same
difference”, they mean that two different things don’t matter much. If a Dosa and an Idli are both tasty, someone might say, “Same difference, just eat!” But does that really make sense? - Why Does “Wind Up” Mean Both Starting and Ending?
If you wind up a watch, you start it. But if you wind up an essay or a meeting, you end it! So, does “winding up” mean beginning or finishing? Maybe English just likes to keep us spinning in circles—just like a maths problem that never ends!
English is Funny!
In India, we mix English with Hindi, Tamil, Telugu, Malayalam, and other languages, making it even more fun! But even without our desi twists, English itself is full of confusing phrases.
The next time someone says something funny in English, just smile and say, “English is like
Indian traffic—full of unexpected turns!”
Dr. N. N. Sangesh
Parent of N. S. Saathvika (Grade III-G)
Mahatma Baba CBSE